dear mommy friends

So, let me preface this by saying--I love my girlfriends. All of them. Whether we see and talk on a daily basis, or there are weeks or months between them. Each relationship is unique. And I seriously treasure each of them. Even through this rant!

I am in what I consider a unique position amongst my friends. I am in my 30s. I'm married. Yet, I have no children--well of the human kind (furry kids count, right?!). The majority of my girl friends are in their 30s (wide ranging). Married. Have 2.5+ rugrats running around. Some are done. Some are still hoping to expand their families. Most have "natural" children (meaning their husbands knocked them up). Some have adopted kids. Whatever it looks like--the overwhelming majority of my friends have growing families. 

Then there is me.  (I've blogged about this before--the status quo blah blah blah.....)

That's NOT what this about. 

I'm actually okay with where God has us. We are on our own journey, and He knows where it is headed. So, I'm taking refuge in that truth. 

It's everyone else who seems to have the issue. 

I used to be invited to all things that involved my friends and their little ones--birthday parties, babysitting for parents night out, beach days, "field trips", I mean any and everything. I even got phone calls about first words, potty training, steps. etc. BUT, all that fizzled. As the years have gone on, and more kids have come into the picture, and more events have passed---everything has shifted. Maybe it's because I don't have kids yet. Maybe it's because I'm the odd man out. Maybe it's because people think I would find it difficult?! I honestly don't know what the reasoning behind it is. 

However, I do know that it sucks. 

Just because life looks different for me at the moment, doesn't mean I don't want to be involved in your families life. It doesn't mean that I find if difficult to be around your kids. It doesn't mean that I love or care any less about your family and the milestones in your kids lives. 

Have you asked me how I feel about it? 
Have you thought about the distance you've created? 
Do you even have a clue as to why we might be where we are--is it by choice or just part of our journey?

My point is this: don't assume things. Let me be the one to decide what I want to come to, how much I want to hear, and how much distance I need. I can assure you--it's probably nothing like you have assumed.

keeping up with the "it's"

LIKE it SHARE it TWEET it INSTAGRAM it PIN it FOLLOW it BLOG it LIKE it SHARE it TWEET it INSTAGRAM it PIN it FOLLOW it BLOG it LIKE it SHARE it TWEET it INSTAGRAM it PIN it FOLLOW it BLOG it LIKE it SHARE it TWEET it INSTAGRAM it PIN it FOLLOW it BLOG it LIKE it SHARE it TWEET it INSTAGRAM it PIN it FOLLOW it BLOG it

.....does that about cover it? My head is spinning from all of IT!!! 

I can't keep up. Seriously! I feel like I have to comment, like, retweet, share, and follow on every single media one person does so feelings don't get hurt, people don't feel left out, blah blah blah. It's insane! It's time consuming, and it's a bit out of control. (Am I alone in this??)

Yes, I Twitter.

Yes, I Facebook (not nearly like I used to!)

Yes, I Instagram (I'm a picture junky for certain)

Yes, I have Pinterest (that I rarely use)

Yes, I blog (occasionally)

Yes, I have a Klout account (although I have no idea why or what it's purpose is!)

What it comes down to, is this: I flat out just don't care about any of the "stats" that go with it all. It doesn't measure who I am. It doesn't make me any more or any less important. It doesn't actually make a difference in my life.  

So, that's why I am going to stop with all the madness,  and recenter.

My identity is not in social media. 

It's not measured by any score. 

It has zero to do with followers or likes. 

To be quite frank...I'm just too old for it! It feels like an online popularity/pissing contest between friends and acquaintances that is so far out of my comfort zone, that I'd rather not have any clue. 

So, I'm gonna go crawl back under my rock, that is in my little black hole, and be oblivious. (and no, that doesn't mean I'm not staying connected, but it does mean I'm taking the pressure off to keep up with everything!)



**If you need me I'll be on Pinterest trying to find some decorating ideas to spruce up my black hole--I'll tweet or instagram the ideas, which I hope you like or follow and then turn into a blog which will hopefully increase my Klout.