silence

I would like to think I'm an optimist. 

Someone who see's things as "half-full".

Who loves looking at the bright side of situations.

Who lives in the lightness and love of this wonderful life.

And, I feel that way 98% of the time. 

[the other 2% is pure hell. literally]

Only when I let things quiet down
--as in become complacent with God --
do things get ugly.

{-Stop praying -Put Him on the back burner -Put everything/everyone else first}

When SILENCE hits

Satan takes hold & RUNs...or rather pulls.

And, he does so with great intensity & force. 

The struggle sets in.

Its tends to make me extremely uncomfortable & uneasy. 

It can open doors & crack windows in my mind that would probably be best kept shut. 

My minds always ends up in a darker place than I'd like to admit. 

I turn into a "half-empty" monster. 

I start focusing on the negative.

I get completely FOCUSED:

on what isn't.

on what I should've done differently. 

on the mistakes.

on the regrets.

on all things that I can't change!

Satan is a strong being. 

He grabs onto this and attaches himself to it like a 1000lb weight on my ankles. 

It's a downward spiral. 

Like a staircase that doesn't stop going down. 

Further & further into the abyss.

I get so lost in the darkness that it's hard to remember that I live in the light. 

I have to claw & fight my way back out. 

BUT--FIGHT I DO!

I refuse to let Satan win.

I refuse to let Satan keep that foothold on my life. My mind. 

I refuse to let Satan keep me down.

No way.

Not a chance.

I am a fighter.

I don't like excuses.

I won't let him keep me down. [For long.]

I quickly have to kick my own butt into gear. 

Snap out of it & move forward.

Can't live in the past. 

Gotta live for today. 

Gotta live for the present.

Gotta live for the promises my God has made me for. 

 Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

AMEN!